Doll
by DreamerOfWorldss
Summary: She was a doll; an emotionless, mindless doll. She would do whatever her Master command- kill, spy, seduce. But what could happen when a supposed target is trying to help her regain her lost humanity and cut her strings?
1. Dolls

"God, forgive me, because I've sinned".

A girl dressed in a beautiful midnight-blue dress kneeled in the middle of a well-kept rose garden, facing a fountain, her eyes on the clear sky.

"Daughter, what are you doing?" a deep, emotionless manly voice disturbed the silent prayer's peace.

"Nothing, father." The girl got up gracefully and in a timid monition, walked toward her father. He stared at the auburn-haired emerald-green eyed girl stoically.

"I told you already, didn't I? All those nonsense about God that you've got into your head are useless." His voice was cold, and the young girl fought back a shiver. If she would show her fright, her condition would worsen. She was already in for a punishment.

"Forgive me, father." She lowered her head in a submissive gesture.

"The only God you'll ever need is me. is that clear?"

"Yes."

Then he slapped her. Hard. Causing her cheek to redden.

"You insolent ungrateful _thing_!" he did not shout. She did not respond. "Remember, you are my doll. An emotionless, mindless _doll_. I am the only one in your existence that matters. I am the only reason and mean you are able to maintain something close to Life. Without me, you are nothing. Meaningless thread-less thing!"

"I am a meaningless doll who will obey my father's-my Master's- wishes." She repeated the required respond she gave a hundreds and hundreds of times before.

"Good, my pet. Now, Sakura, you will go to your training with your brother for three hours, and then come so I give you your next role".

"As you command."

And so, the girl called Sakura disappeared.

Her so-called Master and father stood, unmoving, for a moment, checking the trails of her Magic. She barely left any track.

_Good_.

* * *

Sakura appeared at a dark windowless room. A strong smell of MagicCraft hit her nostrils, making her frown slightly before she maintained her mask of indifference.

"Sister," a familiar voice reached her ears. She turned, activating her Magic to enforce her sight, and stared at the tall, dark figure of her brother.

"Brother," she greeted. "Master commanded three hours."

Touya nodded, and in a swift move got into position. Meantime, Sakura took off her dress and dressed up quickly in a black tight shorts and loose shirt that were put waiting on a wooden chair- the only object in the otherwise empty round room. When finished, she got into her position as well.

An outsider might find the scene amusing; a dark-haired and dark-eyed, muscular man of 190 cm height stands ready to fight a slender girl of 165 cm.

That is, if the fight was a regular one. Which it wasn't; Touya's high face-to-face combat and swordsmanship skills were nicely matched by his sister's daggers and needles-using skills. And even though he was physically stronger than her by far, she was a MagicUser, Wielder of great power.

They began without any visible sign.

Touya's sword appeared as if out of nowhere, and he was aiming to his sister's side.

Sakura easily dodged; it was just a warm-up. Her brother still hasn't gone all out on her.

She summoned her twin daggers and aimed at her brother's vital points. He dodged and counter-attacked, his movements smooth and well-timed.

They continued their deadly dance for about an hour before Sakura decided it was time to throw some Magic in their fight.

She called upon her power- her only comfort in the thing called 'Existence'. She never called it 'Life', given she was taught from childhood she was not a living creature. She was an object, a doll dancing to her Master's wishes, a _thing_. And if her strings were ever cut- so would her ability to keep moving, and she will cease to be.

Her brother was the same, yet different. He was a possession of their Master just like her, but he was _human being_. Unlike her, he was of The Living Ones. A doll with a will of his own, he once joked. She did not laugh. Never. She did not know how.

Touya was familiar with her way of Wielding and MagicUsing, and so could hold his own against her, what with his ability to Sense Magic. He was what their Master called A Sensor- and a well trained one, at that. He could predict what kind of Magic his opponent was going to use most of the time, and even Deflect simple Magical attacks or Mask them.

Three hours flew by, and the two siblings came to a sudden stop as their inner clocks rang the end of the session.

"Have a quick shower then go. You know he doesn't like it when we come sweaty or dirty," Touya said, barely panting. "I will meet you there." And with that he turned to take a shower himself.

Sakura did as he said, and five minutes later appeared, clean and wet-haired, dressed in a simple green dress, outside of her father's office. She knocked and got in after receiving permission.

The room was organized and well-lightened. A big window was placed behind the expensive-looking mahogany desk on which the newest computer model stood with a chair behind it. A black phone was the only other thing- beside papers- on the desk. Shelves full of books and files completed the modest office.

"Father," Sakura said, "brother shall be here any moment now."

He did not answer nor did he move from his chair. His eyes were fixed on the computer screen.

Barely a minute later, Touya knocked on the door and came in after he was invited.

"In a few days, the Li family will host a party at their mansion," The seated man started. "Li Yelan is an acquaintance of mine as I had worked with her late husband, Li Xie-Lang, on occasions, and so I was invited." He wasn't looking at either of them as they listened quietly. "The family is a big shot at the business- and sometimes political- world. I need to keep my connections with them. I will be going to the party, and the two of you will come with me."

It wasn't a surprise, really. Sakura and Touya had escorted their Master on many different occasions in the past- be it a drug deal, business meetings or a party. After receiving the details (apparently, the party was held in honor of the family's heir's coming-of-age ceremony), the black-haired black-eyed man dismissed Touya.

He stared at Sakura for a moment before speaking. "You will seduce the young heir. That will be your main course. I need him to fall head-over-heel in love with you." She did not ask his reasons- he never said more than necessary- nor did she really care. She was used to his sometimes reasonless-looking orders. Be it spying, murdering or sleeping with someone, she will do whatever. Be it for revenge, power, influence, position or- sometimes- only for her Master's amusement, she and her brother will do whatever. It was not her pace to question his reasons.

"Come here, my beautiful doll." He ordered in a voice she knew all too well. His eyes were filled with lust as she did as ordered and sat on his lap. He caressed her porcelain-like smooth skin and turned her blank face to look up at him.

Her emerald-green eyed held nothing in them. She felt nothing. She was a doll, after all, acting to her Master's will.

"Remember, my Sakura. You are nothing without me. You need nothing nor none else. I'm the God of your world," his lips spread butterfly kisses on her cheek, her temple, her jaw.

He always did it before she was sent to seduce and sleep with another, as if to remind her who and what she was- to whom she belonged.

Whenever he did it, the person she once was would struggle for acknowledgment, would struggle to run. And as always, as he held himself above her, ready to enter her, she shrieked and cried and begged him to stop. And as always, he would laugh and hit her.

He liked it when she struggled. He was always a sadist, and hitting people who would not react gave him no satisfaction. The crying girl beneath him, on the other hand, was exactly the thing that turned him on.

He thrust into her, roughly, making her cry out in pain. He was never gentle, never waited for her to be ready. He kissed her, shutting her sweet, pained voice.

Smirking, he began to move. Faster and faster and stronger till he cam inside her.

Sakura was dazzled with pain. She never liked having sex- much less with her Master. At least most of the other people she could never remember all that clear, that she was ordered to sleep with, used to foreplay and so it wasn't as painful. But it wasn't all that enjoyable either. She had trained in the art of seducing and pleasuring just as she was trained in the art of killing. She knew how to make men crumble at her feet, begging for her touch. She knew how to make them cam over and over again and how to stop just before they reached their peak and work her sweet torture, preventing them their release.

But she never liked it.

Not one bit.

* * *

It was four days later that Sakura and Touya were to prepare for the ball- the party at the Li mansion. It was, apparently, a costume party, and fitting outfits were prepared for the two.

Sakura took a shower and started getting ready. If she was to seduce the young heir and make sure to leave a lasting impression, she had to be perfect.

She put on lacy, fancy lingerie and put on the red dress. The dress was open at the back and tied behind her neck. The front was square-shaped, showing off just enough of her cleavage to tease and arouse the imagination. She wore high heeled black shoes and her only jewels were a platinum chain with a simple black-silver lock the shape of a sakura petal- it was a gift her Master gave her- a symbol to remind her always she was his, and she was to wear it always except while training- and a pair of a simple black earrings. She made her long auburn hair up in a messy elegant bum, letting a few locks down. She wore no makeup, only using some mascara and black eyeliner.

_Done_, she thought, looking at her reflection in the mirror in her room. Her room was painted plain white, the only furniture her bed, a closet, a drawer and her mirror. She needn't nothing else.

* * *

Touya was feeling grouchy, but, as always, maintained his unreadable expression. Not that it was really necessary, given he was wearing a mask, but his Master somehow knew. He always knew. And so, the angry man had masked and denied his feeling in attempt to prevent the hatful man whom he and his sister were forced to refer to as 'father' or 'Master' from finding out his real thoughts. And those thoughts were very much rebellious and venomous.

He hated him! He _hated_ what that man had done to him and, most of all- had done to his little sister! He would have given anything to just kill the sick bastard or at least run from him, but he could not.

Not as long as his sister's life were so tangled up in that man's that without him she would not be able to keep on living.

He had to somehow cut the messed up ties that held his sister's life. He had to get rid of the threads.

He was brought out of his dark and depressing thoughts by the very sister about whom he was thinking as she tapped his shoulder to get his attention.

"It's time", she said.

He nodded. Time for the show to begin. Their 'Master' was quite a fond of melodrama.

They entered the ball room. 20 minutes late, as planned.

Sakura clang to their Master's arm and Touya, whose main role was to watch out for any dangers and, if needed, to protect their 'father', walked on her other side.

As they made their way down the stairs, all eyes followed them.

Touya didn't blame them. After all, both his sister and he were taught how to either avoid or lure attention; their movements were graceful, their postures ones kings themselves would envy, and he was well aware they both appeared quite appealing to the opposite sexes. And, of course, their Master did not fell behind as he was the one to teach them.

Conversations continued slowly again, and the young man had no doubt what the new topic would be.

"Great, as always", the approval and satisfaction were clear in their Master's voice. "I will now introduce you to Yelan and her son. After that, walk around for a bit. Sakura, I want you to make sure the young Li boy will come to you himself", he whispered. They nodded slightly.

"Ah, Yelan! It is so good to see you again!" he called when they neared a well dressed, middle-aged woman. She turned to him and a small, cold smile appeared on her face.

"My, if it isn't Kinomoto-san!" she answered, a clear dislike in her voice.

"Oh, please, dear Yelan, call me Katsuri". She only bent her head slightly in respond. "I believe you have yet to meet my daughter and son," it was not a question. "This here is Touya, and that pretty one is Sakura," they both bowed slightly in respect when he introduced them.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Yelan-san. I must say, seeing a woman holding a position such as yours is always delightful and refreshing," Sakura said, getting into role.

"My, what a polite daughter you have, Katsuri," Yelan looked Sakura from head to toes.

"I am very proud of her."

"I'm sure," she said dryly. "And I believe you have yet to meet my son, too." She turned her head to look for her son and called him.

A young man, almost as tall as Touya, with chestnut hair and the most beautiful amber eyes walked toward them. He had his mask off, just like his mother and Katsuri, and wore a simple but elegant traditional Chinese black and green outfit. He walked with confidence and the siblings could clearly feel the power he radianced. He came to a stop in front of them and bowed slightly.

"This is my son, Xiao Lang, or Syaoran. Son, I want you to meet Kinomoto Katsuri and his children, Touya and Sakura," the two bowed again.

"My greetings in honor of your eighteen birthday, Li-san," Sakura said politely, her voice soft and alluring, almost bewitching. She stretched out her hand for him and he kissed it.

"Please, call me Syaoran," he answered, his eyes already unable to move from her figure.

"It is a pleasure to meet you all, indeed," Touya spoke for the first the time, his voice sounding slightly bored. "If you will excuse me," he bowed again and left. All according to the plan.

"Please, forgive my son. I have to admit, he did not really wanted to come," Katsuri said in pretended disapproval.

"It is understandable. Now, if you will excuse me too, I have other guests I need to talk to." And with that she left.

"Well than, I will leave you for now, too." Katsuri nodded to the young man and patted Sakura's hand affectionately before leaving.

"My, seems like I've been abandoned," Sakura whispered as if to herself.

Syaoran laughed at her expression. "If so, allow me to escort you for a while, Kinomoto-san. It would be such a loss for a young beautiful girl to walk around alone."

She smiled at him and took his offered hand. "Please, Syaoran-san, you may call me Sakura." She said softly.

"Well then, Sakura, you should drop the 'san' too. Honestly speaking, I was never one for the formalities." He admitted in a light tone.

Sakura glanced at him. The information her Master gave her was true. He was definitely handsome, and she hadn't doubted he had the ability to make his soundings to loosen up and open up to him. It was clear from the greetings people gave him he was quite popular and even admired- and the envious stares she got from the majority of the females present, he was also desirable. She couldn't blame them.

"I feel bad. I'm taking you from all of your guests", she said as he asked her to dance and they began making their way on the dancing floor.

"I could have said the same thing," he laughed, and she couldn't help but wonder at how easy a smile formed on his lips and how at ease and light his laugh sounded in her ears.

She was not used to hear such warmth in a male voice.

"The same?' she asked in fake innocence, and he laughed again. Sakura found herself looking for ways to make him laugh. It had a nice ring.

"Don't pretend you did not realize the influence you have over the male population of the ball!" he said in a mocking tone. "Whatsmore, I'm sure a powerful MagicUser such as you would easily Sense it."

She smiled as if he caught her. "My, I'm flattered. And, mister, you Wield some powerful Magic yourself," he grinned and shrugged.

"Admitting guilt," he said, pretending as if admitting a terrible crime.

They continue to exchange smart remarks as they danced, not paying attention to their soundings or to the flowing time.

Well, Sakura, being what and who she was, did mark the flowing hours, and she knew the ball was close to its end. It was time to make her move.

"Your agility is far greater than mine, Oh-High-and-Mighty," she mocked as she pretended to be wearied out, "would you care for a break and a drink?"

Instead of answering, Syaoran took her hand and led her to the long table where the drinks and some light food were placed.

They took a glass of wine each, and he walked her to the empty balcony. Sakura took of the mask covering her eyes and cheeks.

"What a beautiful night," she said quietly, and a sudden, unexplained sadness washed over her.

She did not understand it, though, but she was used to feel weird whenever she needed to play a role. _I wish it was really me_… and then she froze. Why did she think that? Why did she wish such thing?

"Sakura? Are you okay?" her target's voice was full of concern.

"Yes. Yes, everything is fine…" he looked at her, his brilliant eyes honest and open and breath-taking. And all of a sudden, she felt tainted. Dirty.

He reached for her, concern clear in his amber eyes, but she flinched and backed away.

She didn't want him to touch her! She didn't want to taint him!

"Sakura?"

She could feel it. The child inside her stirred, trying to break free. A familiar pressure in the back of her head was her only warning before tears began appearing in her cold, emotionless eyes.

She touched her wet cheek, almost surprised. _Tears? Why?_ She was not in pain, she did not hurt… so what was this uncomfortable feeling in her chest? Why did breathing became such a hard task all of a sudden?

_Why could she _feel_? How could a stranger awake such strong emotion from within her?_

"No…" the words came out without her consent. "No… I'm a doll. Master's doll…"

Syaoran could feel Magic been used and tensed automatically, but the Magic seemed to have come from Sakura- and was used on her.

_Why would she use her Magic like that? This feeling… it's a memory-controlling kind of Magic…_

"Sakura! Stop it!" he called, uneasy feeling taking over his body. Whatever it was she was doing- it was bad. He _has_ to stop her!

Sakura couldn't hear him. She caught her head in her hands. _It hurts! It hurts! It hurts! Please make it stop! Please!_ Her Magic got out of control, and she was just aware enough to feel someone else's Magic interfering, blocking hers, preventing her from the relief her Magic suggested in the comforting darkness.

Syaoran called upon his own Magic and managed to stop Sakura's. But it was taking all of his will power and concentration. She indeed Wielded a strong power. But he had to hold on; else their Auras might clash and cause a Pandemonium resulting in the whole mansion suffering from the consequences.

"Sakura, listen to me!" he shouted, finally succeeding to catch her trembling body. "I don't know what this is all about, but you _have_ to control your power!" _why won't anyone come? We both radiant strong Auras… someone was supposed to notice…_

Syaoran desperately tried to make the frightening girl to look at him, but she refused to open her shut eyes. She seemed to be in so much pain…

And so, he did the only thing he could think about.

He kissed her.

* * *

Well, this is the first fanfic I've ever posted…. It is done, actually. I just need to check it again…

Now I really hope people will read it. **And review!**

This fanfic might seem rush a bit, but honestly it was originally supposed to be a two-shots, but somehow ended up MUCH longer! Haha==]]]

Sorry for any mistakes; English isn't my native language


	2. Forsaken One

**MySelf:** this one contains a rape scene. **You've been warned**! It's your decision to keep reading or not (or just skip that one scene).

**I:** please also check the new story by **I**!

**Disclaimer:** I forgot to write on my former post but **I do not own CCS or any of the characters!** (Well, except Katsuri, but who will possibly want to own HIM anyway?)

Also thanks so much to **Moonlight919 **for the first review I've ever got!

Love you all who put me on story alert but I will appreciate it if you also **review**! By the way, I think I will start updating only once I get at least **five** **reviews** for every new chapter I post (I know I'm new to this and this is my first fanfic but bear with me)

**Chapter two- Forsaken One**

Touya watched his sister and the Li boy talking. He knew his sister was only playing her role, but watching her so… _content_ and _lively_ made his heart ach. She didn't deserve to suffer. She didn't deserve the empty existence that that damn son of a bitch forced upon her!

And with those thought in mind, he notice something was different. _Sakura_ seemed different.

_Is it possible_? He asked himself, allowing hope, for the first time in years, to find its way to his heart. Could it be possible that his sister finally hit the point of breaking? Could her heart be, after all those years, awaken?

And if it was, he had to allow her the chance to come back, to break the cages and locks.

To cut her strings.

And she won't be forced to be a doll anymore.

And so, he used his abilities, and blocked the balcony from the rest of the word. None would be able to Sense what was happening out there.

* * *

Sakura struggled against his hold at first, but then, as if giving up, her body went limp.

"Sakura…" Syaoran's voice was barely a whisper, as he examined her beautiful now exposed face. "Are you okay?"

She did not answer, bur her eyes opened slowly, and her Magic started to calm.

"S-Syaoran?" her expression was blank, her eyes dead. "What's happening to me?" She murmured weakly. She was confused. And scared. She felt as if a part of her that was asleep for the longest time began to awaken, to take over.

_I have to get away!_

"I'm not sure what was going on, but you seemed to be in a lot of pain…" his voice trailed. Her eyes were unfocused. She seemed tired.

Determined, Syaoran swept her off her feet and held her in his arms. She breathed sharply, shocked. But before she had a chance to protest, he said, "I'm taking you someplace you can rest for a while," his tone was final, stating a fact, not asking for permission.

Sakura still intended to argue, but her rational side reminded her of her mission, and so she gave in and settled against his chest, her arms snaking around his neck.

"Take me, then," She said playfully in the most commanding and spoilt-princess-like tone she could master up in her current shaken state. She kept a straight face, her Magic adding sparkle to her doll-like lifeless eyes.

He smiled cockily. "As you command, my dear princess."

* * *

Katsuri was angry. Even furious. Everything went according to plan. That is, until… "You useless little piece of crap!" he spit at the young girl's face. "Can't you complete one simple task? How worthless can you get? Surely you hit the bottom." His voice was full of venom. He hit her and she fell to the ground. He kicked her in the stomach cruelly, taking pleasure in her pained cries. Then he seemed to calm down.

"Sakura, Sakura, Sakura. My poor, beautiful doll," he kneeled beside her, his hands on his thighs. "It appears, my doll, that you are in dire need of some discipline," he spoke softly. She shivered.

He rolled her on her back. "Lay straight," he ordered. She obeyed silently. He tore the dress from her body and threw the expensive fabric, leaving her in her underwear. "You sure are quite a sight, my pet. Anyone would want to touch this perfect fair skin of yours. Anyone would be captivated by those piercing eyes and alluring voice…" his fingers trailed over her skin. He stroked her face, her throat and down to her collarbone and over her half-covered breasts.

She began to tremble, causing her Master to smirk in satisfaction. "You could have avoided this little lesson, my pet, if only you let the stupid kid to fuck you! Now you leave me no choice."

His hand traveled over the valley between her breasts, down her flat, slightly muscled stomach, to her abdomen and her thighs. His hand went up again and stopped on her covered womanhood. He rubbed forcibly, making her whimper. He tore her remained clothes and started sucking, biting and licking on her right breast. His right hand, meanwhile, played with her nether region for a few minutes before he thrust two fingers into her painfully. She shrieked and cried, shutting her legs tight. He forced them open and thrust another finger into her, making circles, pushing and rubbing.

Sakura tried to move, to get away, but he hit her on her face so hard she laid there, dazed, as his mouth worked on her other breast.

_Someone, please!_ She shouted in her mind. _Please save me!_ She cried, and begged, and pleaded, but her Master wouldn't stop.

She was wet now. So wet she was disgust. So was tainted and dirtied… why won't she just die? Why won't he just let her be?

She felt him licking her juices, and then kissing her so she will taste herself in his mouth.

She could feel his arousal against her tights. He took off his pants and placed one of her hand over his member, inside his boxers, making her rub and stroke it up and down.

He stopped kissing her and in a sharp move got his hand from within her.

She cried out again. He laughed at her helpless beaten figure.

"My lovely doll," he whispered in her ear. Then he got up and placed his arousal over her face, holding his member out of the boxers. "Suck," he ordered harshly. Sakura averted her face, shutting her eyes and mouth. He slapped her again. "I know you want it, my pet. You are nothing but a slut who murdered her own parents and sold herself and her brother to slavery," he said cruelly, his voice rough and raw with lust and excitement.

"NO, no- I didn't! I didn't! I'm not-"

"But you did my doll. Do you really believe they died in an accident? No, pet. _You _killed them! You let your evil power loose and blow your entire house up! You burned them alive. They screamed for a long time… barely managed to get your brother out of there before the house collapsed…"

"NO! STOP!" she tried to use her Magic, but it was left just out of her grasp, unattainable. It abandoned her too…

"Forsaken One, that's what your kind called…" he whispered mercilessly. She shook her head with fury. Liar! All lies… "Don't you want to forget again, pet?" his gentle voice filled her head. "Want me to make it better?"

She was so numb. She couldn't think. She knew only one thing- she needed her Magic in order to forget, and the only one capable of helping her do so, was her Master, that very man who leaned over her. So she nodded, half-blind from tears and pain.

"Then do as I said," he repeated. She opened her mouth obediently and he thrust his erected manhood into her mouth. She gagged, but he didn't allow her to move. He repeated his order, and she helplessly and blindly sucked, not even really aware anymore of what she was doing.

He cam in her mouth, and she gagged again and stopped breathing as he forced her to swallow. He collapsed on top of her, knocking the breath out of her before he rolled over and got up, getting dressed.

She lay there, unmoving, half unconscious, staring blankly at the ceiling.

"Next time you meet with Li Syaoran, you will have sex with him, make him unable to forget you, and when I order you to, you will kill him. You won't make the same mistake and decide to spare him." He said in an uncaring manner.

"Yes, Master."

* * *

It has been three days since the ball, and Sakura was like a ghost roaming in the mansion and the rose garden.

Touya was almost unable to watch. His sister's condition has worsened. She didn't even speak to him. And her eyes were duller than ever.

_Soon_, he promised to himself after a silent session of work out with his sister. _I shall get my revenge soon_…

* * *

"Hello, Syaoran," a soft, feminine voice made him jump from his sea on the bed, where he readied himself to go to sleep.

He turned around, and stared, perplexed at the fair girl standing just behind him.

_How did she get here? I haven't even Sensed her presence!_

"Sakura? What are you-"

She cut him short by walking to stand right in front of him, so close her chest was touching his. She smiled up at him- the most beautiful and sad and damn _sexy_ smile he had ever seen on anyone's face. Her hands traveled on his bare chest in ghostly manner, teasing.

"I've never had the chance to thank you as I should have… about that time you let me rest in your guest room…" she snaked her hands around his waist, causing him to tense.

"Sakura- what-"

"Hush now," her hands made their way up his spin and ended around his neck. He shivered. "There is no need to talk." And she pulled his head down and kissed him.

It started as a gentle, somewhat hesitated kiss on Syaoran's part, but grew passionate as Sakura sucked on his lower lip and nibbled on it gently, making Syaoran to open his mouth and sticking her tongue in his.

He did the same, and they both fought for domination before Sakura gave in, giving herself over.

Syaoran broke the kiss for much needed air, and she began trailing kisses on the line of his jaw to his ear. She nibbled on it, making him moan, and found the sensitive spot behind and below his ear.

Her hands caressed his muscular chest, his abs, and down to his abdomen… it was driving him crazy. She turned from the innocent sweet girl he met at his ball to a sensual woman who knew exactly where to touch to drive him to the edge and over.

"Sakura, Stop! If you won't stop now I-"

"Take me, Syaoran," she successfully shut him up. "Please. I want it. Wanted to feel you since that first time we met. Or have you forgotten about me?"

Forgotten? How could he possibly forget her? She was the most mesmerizing woman he had ever met! He longed to meet her again. Thought about her every day…

"Sakura, it's not okay…"

"You don't want me?" she sounded like a little, scared girl, who asked her parents to stay with her till she fall asleep.

"It's not that! You know what I mean-"

"Then you _do_ want me," she smiled. The most heart-breaking smile ever. And he knew he will never be able to resist her, to deny her of anything. But it will be wrong. If he slept with her now- made _love_ to her- he will act like a total jerk. Like he cared only for the sex- and that would be a total lie. Because he cared about _her_. Something about her called to him. Ever since he saw that hurt expression, the desperation, on her beautiful face, he couldn't but wonder what the reason was- and wish he could help her.

But she was not helping his resolve as she suddenly stripped of her robe, reviling a very mature and suggesting bra and panties. He breathed deeply, hard, trying to relax himself and calm the blood rushing to his nether region.

"Syaoran, I really like you. I want you. Don't you care about me?" she purred in his ear in a seducing tone, her hands skillfully finding all his weak points.

What kind of logic was that? Of course he cared- that was why he was trying to resist!

In his confused and aroused condition, he could not even start to wonder why or how she was there like that, with no apparent reason. And thinking became near impossible when she took his hand and placed it over her hard breast and the erect nipple under her bra.

She moaned softly in his ear, kissing his throat. He was losing his grasp on reality under her touch.

"Take me…" she breathed as she moved his hand over her body. "Syaoran...!"

He couldn't take it anymore. He compelled to her request.

And as they both reached their climax, they called each other's name in a sweet, sweet desiring voice.

* * *

This routine continued for about a week; Sakura will appear at his room just when he got ready to sleep, they would make love, and after a few more minute of rest, she would kiss him goodbye and leave.

For all that he worse, he would have gladly locked them both from the rest of the world for the rest of their lives. He tried to make her stay every night, wanting to hold her and feel her warmth as he slept, but she will always refuse, claiming if she went missing, her father and brother will go berserk with worry.

Yet, he missed her. Missed her every hour of the day, praying the night will come. Syaoran wasn't an idiot. He knew what he was feeling was more than just lust. Actually, he really believed that if things will keep on going as they were, he might find himself falling in love with her…

With this somewhat frightening yet exciting thought, he waited for her to appear as she always did.

* * *

Sakura got herself ready for her nightly visit. She was actually _expecting_ that. For some reason she didn't care enough to question, the knowledge she will meet _him_ got her restless and impatience.

But that was when her Master summoned her.

"I see you are ready," he looked her over and nodded in approval. "Very good. I'm assuring the young man is intriguing with you?"

"Yes Master. As you commanded."

"Job well done, my doll. I had a meeting tonight with that bitch Yelan. I gave her one last choice for atonement for her husband's past behavior. She refused to obey, as that bastard did, and now, my daughter, you shall punish her by killing her son- just like I killed her husband."

* * *

When Sakura showed up, Syaoran knew something was wrong. Her eyes were void of the usual sparkle, and she seemed distant and cold.

"Sakura-"

"Syaoran, please hold me," she pleaded and fell into his open arms, reliving in his reassuring embrace. "Please, Syaoran, sleep with me…"

Confused and worried, he tried to get what was wrong out of her, but she only pleaded with him more- and seeing her miserable was just not a thing he tolerated, so he did as she asked, and made sweet and slow and gentle love to her.

_**Might**__ fall in love? Who am I kidding? I fell long time ago- fell hard._

They both reached their peak when Sakura began to cry.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry… so sorry Syaoran…"

And as he found release inside her, and she found hers, he whispered, "I love you, Sakura, I will always be here. I will always be here for you."

"No! I'm… I'm dirty! I'm corrupted! You must never say it!" she buried her head in his chest, hiding herself from Reality. _I don't want to kill him!_

"Sakura, tell me! I won't let you distract me again! What is it that causes you so much pain?"

She raised her head to him, one hand placed behind his back so he won't see the object she held. Her face was dead, devoid of anything at all.

"I'm a doll, Syaoran," she spoke, "I'm my Master's doll. I only obey his orders. I only do as he asks. My father and Master is the only reason I can travel among The Living, watching but never touching, never feeling. I'm a murderer, a spy, a whore. I'm a doll dancing to its Master's commend. I move to the will of He Who Pulls My Strings."

She touched his shocked face, stroking his cheek. "I… wish it could be different."

The knife came down as if out of nowhere.

* * *

**MySelf: **a cliffhanger! A cliffhanger! Muwahahahahhaa

And on a sane note…

Well, finished with this chapter…. I have to say, as I read the chapters again, I see they really _do _rush! Even more than I thought! But I actually kinda like it. I'm not gonna change or add scenes…

Ok, I have a confession: I finished this story in _two days_! Yep, sounds weird (usually I can work on a story weeks, months, years…) but it is also a very short one. I believe it will take about three or four more chapters (less than I thought when I posted the first chap) and a short epilogue and then we done!

And as I already said, I've got the whole thing on the computer already, so it won't take much time for the story to be finished I guess… I'm quite proud of **MySelf**, actually! She is the one who came up with the idea!… (Well she sure posses one hell of a dark, sadistic mind… brr twistedddd)==]]]

**MySelf: ain't that why you all loovvee me sooo! Anyway, please **_review_**! **

**Love ya all!**

****Evermore****


	3. A Living Person

**MySelf: **Yay! Another chapter down! Now I'm gonna get my COFFEEE!

**I: **baka **MySelf**! This is **I**'s coffee!

**Me**: ookkayy…. Lets just leave them- much safer for us all… anyway, WE OWN NOTHING! (Aside for the plot and one very hate-able character). We sure would like to, though….

Also, thanks soo much to who was the first reviewer of the last chap!

**: MySelf** wanted to be evil and not put the Epilogue, but your review persuaded her! HeheXD (By the way, you wrote one of my fave fanfics! **Spoil of war XD**)

Lastly, I got an **anon** _review_ which I want to answer: I know their nightly meetings aren't described, but it is on purpose- Syaoran already admitted to his feelings, but Sakura is still struggling and distancing herself from him, knowing she is to kill him soon, _and_- their meetings were mostly physical anyway; then Sakura will leave, so there isn't much to describe on the emotional side. _**But**__- _there will be a shortflashback on the last chap and I might add another one… anyway, you will also get Syaoran's thoughts in this chap, which will explain what happened between him and Sakura last chap.

**Thank you all who reviewed! I love you guys!**

Now, please enjoy!

**Chapter three- A Living Person**

Touya was restless. Something happened, he could feel it, could feel it nagging at him to no end.

He sighed. _I can't keep going like that_…

He had to act. Soon. This week or never. The more time he spent in that loathsome place, the more he becomes trapped. And Sakura's condition showed no sign of improvement- more like the opposite.

A new sound in his dark, naked room aside for a bed and a closet alerted him that whatever that unusual event was, it was about to occur.

His shock only grew, though, when he saw what caused the noise.

Sakura appeared in his room, wearing manly clothes that were obviously too big for her, holding onto someone he saw only once before but knew all about; the very alive Li Syaoran.

S&S

"What the hell?" Touya sounded more dumbfound than angry. "You still alive?"

Syaoran gave the older man a very annoyed look. "So it seems", was his sarcastic remark.

Touya ignored him and stared at his sister who averted her gaze from him.

"Touya," her voice was soft, vulnerable. "Please, brother, I can't do it anymore. I can't keep going like that. I have to cut the strings. I need to learn how to become a Living Person.

"Would you help me, brother?" and she raised her hand to her throat and pulled. She showed him what lay on her palm- the chain their 'Master' put on her.

Instead of answering, Touya simply closed the distance between his sister and him and hugged her tightly.

"Everything for you, little sister."

S&S

Kinomoto Katsuri was irritated. And unsatisfied. And angry.

It appeared as if his precious puppets are trying to make a move on their own. If there was one thing he hated the most, it was disrespect.

And that was exactly what his dolls showed. Especially his pretty pathetic brain-washed doll he so loved to play around with. _Oh, my little Sakura, you will come to regret ever thinking of standing against me._

He was readily waiting for his two puppets and the one intruder as they appeared outside his door and opened it.

"Well, now, my dolls. Looks like you've grown some balls, hm?" he laughed childishly at his words-game.

Syaoran watched him, sickened. This man was clearly out of his mind. He abused physically, emotionally and mentally his nephews- that, of course, after he forcibly made his niece use her too great powers and got them out of control, resulting by his brother and his family's house's ruin. The whole place collapsed on the heads of its residents, with Touya surviving because his parents managed to throw him out a window on the second floor, and Sakura surviving with the protection of her Magic.

And that twisted murderer took those two kids and manipulated them, turned them into machines- slaves- striping them from their humanity, raping their bodies, their souls, their minds…

As Syaoran watched the man, recalling how he narrowly managed to stop Sakura's attempted murder and convincing her that she can- and should- resist that Katsuri person, and promised he will help her and stay by her side, he gave an oath to himself that he will see to it personally that the monster will suffer and be severely punished before his death.

_**Flashback**_

_The knife came down as if out of nowhere. Only Syaoran's trained and sharp reflexes saved him from certain death, as he automatically blocked Sakura's descending armed hand and ducked at the same time._

"_What the hell- Sakura-"_

_She watched him with unchanged face. She seemed as if moving in a dream…_

"_Syaoran," her hollow voice was disturbing, "Master's command must be fulfilled…" and she charged at him again._

_This time, though shocked, he was ready. He skillfully caught her hands, and activated his Magic so she won't be able to escape or use her own._

_The two were locked in a mighty battle of wills for a few moments, holding each other in deathly grips._

"_Sakura! Snap out of it!" Syaoran yelled desperately. If they will continue, there will be no guarantying either of them will survive. Drastic measures were had to be taken. "Sakura," his voice was gentle, loving. "I won't fight you. I told you, didn't I? I love you, and I will always be here for you. So if what you want is for me to die, so be it." And ever so slowly, his eyes never leaving her blank ones, he let go of his Magic and weakened his grip on her._

_In an instant, she was above him, confining him to the bed. A moment of complete silent fell on the dark room. Neither dared breathing._

_Suddenly, Syaoran could feel hot liquid falling on his face, and the lithe body above him began shaking._

"_I'm sorry…" The tortured woman he loved whispered. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry' I'm-"_

_He cut her words by slipping from under her weak hold and pulling her down into a comforting embrace._

_The stayed in this position for a while, completely naked. The only feelings between them those of warmth and understanding. No lust. No passion; just a comforting share of endless, understanding warmth._

"_Will you tell me everything?" he broke the Magical silence. Sakura nodded slightly._

"_It's time for me to face the past."_

_**End flashback**_

_Oh, how bad he will pay… _Syaoran was determined. Katsuri, though, did not appear to be threatened by his deadly glare.

"Sakura, my pet, are you seriously intending on turning on me? You never resist me when we are alone. You _like_ it when I'm inside you, fucking you, touching you…" he licked his lips.

Sakura began to shake violently, whimpering pitifully.

"Shut up you sick bastard!" Syaoran couldn't take it anymore as the man who controlled the one he loved so desperately for all her life, continued his horrible never-ending torture. Katsuri ignored him, his eyes fixed on Sakura's quivering form.

"You asked for that. We both know that. None will believe you if you try to claim I raped you, my doll. You are nothing but a whore, and that's what everyone will ever see!"

"Don't listen to him Sakura," Touya's calm voice was deathly. "Don't let him manipulate you anymore. You are far stronger than him. He is just scared of you. He is a liar. We all know that. A sick son of a bitch. A sadist who finds pleasure by torturing and raping little kids!" he snarled, growled even. He put one hand on his terrified sister's shoulder. "You can do it, little sister. You can attack him with your Magic. You can kill him."

Katsuri looked almost bored. He was sure of his ability to block Sakura's Magic. He had, after all, a physiological control over her; as long as her fear from him remains, she will never be able to hurt him with her Magic. She was too scared of the possibility of losing control again; of repeating the incident which caused her parents' death.

He will very much enjoy using her to kill those two un-respectful kids.

S&S

Syaoran kept silence, trying to control his anger and fury. He would have blown the bastard himself had he could. But Touya explained to him earlier that no MagicalPower could be called upon in this mansion; that is, aside from Sakura's Magic.

He was also warned of Katsuri's combat skills. Touya told him beforehand that their only chance of escaping and freeing themselves for good was for Sakura to kill the madman.

It has to be her, or she will never escape his manipulative grasp.

"Sakura, you can do it. Just like you didn't kill me, you can beat him face to face," Syaoran bent to whisper into her ear. "I know you can. I believe in you."

S&S

Katsuri was getting irritated with the wait. If they had no intention of acting, he will be the one to land the first blow.

He tensed his muscles, and attacked.

Touya barely dodged Katsuri's fist. The next moment they were engaged in a mighty battle.

Syaoran analyzed their movement. They were good. But it was also obvious that Touya didn't stand a chance.

"I have to help him. Sakura, get yourself together! You are our last hope. If you won't have the determination, none will be able to help you out." And with those final words, he joined the fight.

Sakura watched as the two young men cooperated in their attempt to get advantage, yet Katsuri read their every move and react just in time.

_I can't help them!_ She thought desperately. _I've tried it once! Hell, I've tried more than once- my Magic just won't obey!_

She was ready to give up when Katsuri suddenly managed to hurt Touya in the gut. Hard. The tall man stumbled, and Katsuri hurriedly took advantage of the situation.

Syaoran tried to block him, but got hit on the face. He looked dazed for a moment. Katsuri summoned his knifes, and aimed one at the young heir while the other went for Touya.

The world froze for Sakura at that moment. The knifes were up- and down they went.

_**No…**_

_Blood everywhere, on her clothes. Her Master praising her kill… "Well done, my pet."_

NO!

_A woman- her mother- screaming for her to run... Her father taking Touya and throwing him out the window… a man she had never met before held her in a painful grip, telling her she was his now…_

"NO! _Don't you touch them_!"Everything went white.

And then everything went black, and she did not see or know anymore.

S&S

**(I actually originally intended to finish the chapter here, but decided to give you another little piece of reading material…=P)**

S&S

The reporters and the police surrounded the ruins of what once was a big mansion.

"Officer, do you know what caused this disaster?"

"Were there any survivors?"

"Please, officer, tell me-"

He shut down the television, unfeeling as he watched the news numbly.

His mother just brought him food, but he ignored her and just sat there, un-responding.

"Li Xiao Lang! Pull yourself together and snap out of it! It has been days already!" his mother tried the tough-approach this time in her attempts to get a reaction out of her son.

He appeared just outside the collapsing mansion, bruised and wounded and weak, and ever since hasn't shown any sings of reaction. He shut himself from the world, hid behind walls of silence.

_She is dead_… was the only thing going through his mind. He watched the necklace- Sakura's necklace- clasped tightly in his hand. He didn't know how it appeared with him- and he didn't care.

_She is dead…_ only when his mother demanded to know who he was talking about did he understood he spoke out loud.

"She is dead. She saved my life by using every last bit of control and power she had left in amidst the MagicStorm. And now, she is dead."

He got up and walked out of the room.

The necklace was left thrown in the fireplace.

**MySelf:** bwahahahha! I'm evil! I'm evil! It's sooo goodd to be baadd! Ha! This sense of power… to be the only one knowing what will happen next… hohohohoho!

**ME**: Now, now, ignore her. Too much caffeine. We slowly nearing the end… please **review**, or **MySelf** might decide to make you her next meal!==]]] (don't worry _**this is NOT the end just yet**_).

**MySelf:** I know it's anyone's secret dream an' all, but the meal will be by FAR more delicious if **MySelf** will have some Snack**Reviews**…. Oh man, I'm hanging around **I** far too much! I'm starting to speak like that poor excuse for an alternative personality… not to mention **Me** who just like to act all high-and-mighty but never actually DOING anything… darn,** MySelf** kinda wants to torture someone now...

By the way, I got a review from **lala-chan** which I couldn't answer, so I just hope this chapter was to your liking! (Your review got me into Tomoyo-style KAWAII modeXD)

Also, I must say, even though not everyone reviewed, I got many positive feedbacks in the forms of putting my story on **alert** and/or **favorite story** list! And even on **author alert**! It made me very happy! ==]]]

**Love ya all!**

****Evermore****


	4. Existing

**MySelf**: oh man, I really love this chapter! The chapter in which everything is getting better- just to go down the drain! Hehe… I won't say anymore- don't want to spoiler!

**I**: why not? **I** gotta say **I** LOVE spoilers! Spoilers are worshiped!

**Me**: well, **Me** must agree with **I**!

**MySelf**: of course they are- as long you are the one receiving them! When you are the one to decide whether to give 'em or not, you should just enjoy and watch people like the two of you crawling!

**I and Me**: you sadist!

****Now, I know many of you asked for the plot to slow down… I'm really sorry for the pace, honest! This style of writing is new to me, so… Hehe, but I really tried- that's why the long waiting- and so this chap become sssooo long I decided to split it into two. I hope it will be to your liking=]**

**Enjoy!**

**Chapter four: Existing**

A young man with chestnut unruly hair and intense-looking amber eyes sat on a couch, watching the Magical flames in the fireplace. He sighed. Whenever he watched the flames, he would become engrossed in thought. Dark, distant thoughts.

_Why? Why couldn't he forget her? It's been more than three damn years!..._

A gust of wind hit his face. He ignored it. _Wait, how could wind blow in here? I'm sure I closed the windows…_ but before he could ponder on that matter, a new flow of memories forced itself upon his mind.

_**Flashback**_

_A gentle gust of wind and the scent of roses it brought were the only warning he got before a pair of delicate fair arms bound themselves around his torso._

_Syaoran wasn't as jumpy anymore, giving it had happened every night for the past few days, and only smiled when the familiar presence of his lover washed over him._

"_Why the dark look?" Sakura's sweet voice whispered in his ear. He leaned back into her hug, inhaling deeply, taking in her scent, calming himself._

"_The elders. And my mother." He answered bitterly._

"_What about them?" she asked, stroking his sides. Her butterfly touches made him shiver, and he could practically feel the little smile playing on the corner of her kissable lips._

"_They are trying to force me into marriage," he said hesitantly. He didn't know what to expect of her, how she will react; they hadn't talked much on their nightly meetings. Whenever he had tried to start a conversation, she will start touching him in this way of hers, making all thoughts to fly out of his head. She had an absolute control. He never saw her losing her calm. But he was too intrigued with her to ponder on that matter or question it- just like he did not question her attitude about those 'secret' meetings._

_Sakura did not reply to his statement- just kept running her hands on his bare skin. A part of him was disappointed; he had wanted her to be angry, or jealous- anything at all. Yet, she seemed to not care._

"_Sakura," he turned to look at her, "don't you care at all?" he hoped the hurt wasn't too clear in his voice and eyes._

"_Syaoran, you are the heir to a rich and powerful family. It is no wonder you've been asked to get married."_

_He got up from the bed where they sat and looked down at her. Anger and rejection were speaking from his mouth when he said, "Well then, if it was so obvious something like that will happen, why are you still here? If it isn't bothering you, what are your motives to keep coming here every night?" he spat._

_Her expression did not change, however, when she finally spoke, her voice sounded hurt, trembling. "I knew it will happen, yes. That is why I'm acting like that. Is it so wrong to want and spent as longest time as I can with someone I-" she cut her sentence abruptly. Her eyes shone with unshed tears. "I-I'm sorry. I guess it is better that I go-"_

_The rest of her words were lost as Syaoran pulled her to him forcefully, crushing her small body to him._

"_Forget what I just said. I'm sorry." He apologized, burring his face in her silky hair. "Guess I'm just upset."_

_She smiled and looked up at him. "I have just the way to lighten your mood"._

_**End flashback**_

He sighed heavily. His heart ached. It was honestly unbearable.

"Hello again, brat." A somewhat familiar voice interrupted his depression.

He jumped, perplexed as he had not felt the stranger approaching, and froze as he recognized the tall dark man standing in front of him.

"You're… _Kinomoto Touya_?" it wasn't really a question; it sounded more as an accusation. "How is that possible? You are dead!" thousands of doubts, fears, guessing and assumptions flood his mind. Was he losing his sanity? Was his dwelling on the past driving him mad?

"Thanks for the information." Touya snorted, smirking at the shocked look on the other man's face. "I must say, I feel quite lively for a dead man." _What an interesting reverse of positions…_

Syaoran was quick to gain his control back. His face was unreadable, but his thoughts run wild. _Touya was alive! He survived… Well, either that or I'm really losing it… which means that, maybe…_but he couldn't allow himself to keep going down that line of thoughts.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he asked instead, trying to keep his composure, to hide the turmoil inside him with anger.

Touya didn't answer. He only examined the young man with a sealed expression, as if looking for something, or considering something.

"Honestly, I do not see what she found in you for her to act as she had." He shook his head. "But, I guess it doesn't really matter."

Syaoran was getting annoyed by now. "What do you want? Just why are you here?"

"Sakura is here." Was Touya's only answer before he turned to leave from the open window through which he apparently came.

"Wait! What- why-" _She is alive! How could it be...? Where was she all this time? Why-_ the thoughts kept going through his head over and over, making him feel dizzy.

"I just thought I should tell you. You may do whatever you want with that information. As for any other questions you might have- you can just ask her yourself." And with that, he jumped out the window and disappeared.

S&S

_It has been three and half years since I last been here…_ a slender girl with long silky auburn hair and piercing emerald-green eyes was walking down the streets of Hong-Kong, her gaze traveling from one shop-window to another.

_It sure hasn't changed…_

Kinomoto Sakura was gone to the world. None will come looking for her. She was free to walk the world on her own. And now, years after her supposed 'death', she was free to come back to the place which once was her 'home'…

"Hello, Sakura."

She froze. She knew that voice. But was it possible…? Slowly, ever so slowly, she turned around to face the one person she had never intended on seeing again. The one person who had changed her existence so.

"Syaoran?" her eyes were wide. It was him, the reason why she had been able to break free from her cage, to escape the threads controlling her.

"So it was true. It really is you…" his voice, deep and quiet, trailed. "It has been a while." He seemed distance, almost unsure. He didn't know why he came here, why he had decided to search her out- to raise the dead from their slumber. But the possibility to see her one last time… he had to. He _had_ to, he told himself, or he would never really be able to move on.

But now, seeing her face to face, her eyes as beautiful and pained just as he remembered, he regretted his decision.

_Will I be able to let go of her? Will I really be able to forget? _He doubted that. He truly did.

"Sakura," he breathed, enjoying the sound of her name coming from his mouth. And then, she was in his arms. Was it him who moved? Or was it her?

It didn't matter. The only thing that mattered was the feeling of her small body in his embrace.

"I'm sorry…" she whispered, tears starting to flow from her eyes. "I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. I didn't want to do all those things…"

"Hush," he silenced her softly. "I know, I know. It's ok now. It doesn't matter anymore".

"But it does!" she called, desperation evident in her voice. "I'm a murderer, Syaoran! And a spy! And a who-"

"Don't say that!" he shook her, his intense amber orbs boring into hers. "Don't you ever say that!"

She sniffed. It was too much. So many emotions… she was still not used to it. Even three and half years later, she was still not used to it. She was overwhelmed.

Her legs gave in, and now Syaoran's hold on her was the only thing that kept her on her feet. She could feel the stares they attracted from the passing people, and without considering her actions, did the only thing she could think about. She transported them to her small apartment.

"Where are we?" Syaoran asked, a bit taken aback by the sudden change of scenery.

"My apartment…" she said. She pushed herself from him, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. "I, ah…"

"I missed you," he outputted. Sakura gave him a confused look. "I wish I have been stronger- I should have helped you! If only I knew how to reach my Magic in there…"

Her eyes softened. She took his hand in her smaller one. "It is all over now." The sadness was clear in her eyes and voice, and Syaoran couldn't stop himself; he kissed her.

It was like electric shock went through his body. The numbness that took over him since that day she 'died' was gone and replaced by joy and content-ness. He felt ecstatic.

"Sakura, Sakura, Sakura…" he murmured her name softly, his lips brushing hers. He repeated her name between sweet kisses, which she returned, taking pleasure just by feeling the warmth radiating off of her lithe body as he crushed her against him.

He knew what he was doing was wrong. He was engaged now. Engaged to be married in three weeks' time. But he couldn't stop. Nor did he want to. Never. He never wanted to let her go. He knew now, knew for sure, _again_- just like back then.

"I love you, Sakura," he said.

She went stiff. He opened his eyes to see the recoiled and somewhat tense look in her eyes. "I- Syaoran-"

"I understand if you don't feel the same," it hurt, hurt so bad, but she was here, with him, and as long as she was safe, as long as he was allowed into her life, he was okay with that. "I won't lie and say I don't care, because I do. But more importantly, I just want you to be happy. And if you will let me, I want to be the one to make you happy." He sounded so sincere, and Sakura found herself wishing she could love him back, wishing she was capable of feelings. He deserved that. _She_ didn't. And yet, he was offering her his unconditional love, without asking for anything in return.

And she found herself tempted.

He was, after all, the one reason she was able to try and take control over her existence. To try and _live_. But it didn't work for her. For the past three years, she was lost. She left her brother, feeling she only dragged him down with her. She left the only place she knew, faking death, to try and look for a way to survive and revive the person she could have been.

But her past never left her. She couldn't run away from it, yet also couldn't face it. She was a string-less doll that turned on its Master. She was tainted. A sinner. And she couldn't stop wonder if the person she called 'Master' was right. Was she a mindless, emotionless object? At the end, was she capable of moving on her own?

Could a doll become a Real Living Person?

"You are not his puppet. Not his in any way, Sakura. And even if you don't know it yet, I do. And I love who you are." Syaoran's tone was comforting and warm. It was as if he could _sense_ her inner turmoil…

Was it possible for something like her to be loved? Could she become _someone_ who was capable of loving?

She honestly didn't know, but a small part of her was yearning for a chance to find out. And so, she kissed him.

"You claim you love me," her hands wounded themselves in his messy hair. "Prove it."

Syaoran smiled against her lips.

S&S

He woke up to the feel of a warm body wrapped in his arms. Syaoran let out a soft, content sigh and tightened his hold on Sakura's sleeping figure. He never understood the expression of someone fitting perfectly in another's hold; not until now. Now, with Sakura finally in his arms, all those cliché words got a whole new very realistic meaning.

His mind wondered to the perfect night they shared; Sakura acted almost shy, even a little scared. She was like a child searching for refuge in his warmth. It was so different than their nights together, and their first time, all those years ago. This time, when they made love, she cried his name in that sweet, alluring voice of hers over and over. She sought his hold and clang to him forcefully as he entered her, her hands boring into the skin of his back. And when they both reached their climax, he felt the hot tears she spilled as she buried her head into his shoulder.

He inhaled her scent, his face buried in her soft hair, totally relaxed and content. She started to stir and move and a gentle smile crept his way to Syaoran's face.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty," he murmured in her ear as she snuggled against him. She smiled and giggled slightly, making his smile to widen even more: it was the first time he had ever heard her laugh. He very much liked it.

Kissing her on her forehead, he asked, "Do you have any plans for today?" She raised her head to stare at him questionably.

"You have something in mind?"

"Actually, I do." He laughed. He gave her a pack on the lips and sat up. "Come on, take a shower and get dressed, we are going to have fun today!" he declared, acting like a little kid going to an amusement park.

Sakura blinked, obviously taken aback by his sudden behavior. "You are weird," she stated offhand-ly.

He smiled slyly at her and pulled her out of bed, kissing her again before going to make them a cup of coffee.

"You bet!"

S&S

After both of them took a shower (and another hot round seeing as Syaoran decided Sakura took too long and so decided to join her and take advantage of her nakedness on the way), they went to get Syaoran a fresh set of clothes (giving he spent the night at Sakura's place, he only had the clothed he wore when they met) at a nearby store and started their 'fun-day'- as he insisted on calling it- by having a breakfast at Syaoran's favorite café.

They talked and laughed and went to shopping, then to watch a movie, ate lunch and finished with a walk on a beach Syaoran trasported them to.

They sat on the sand and watched the ocean's waves in a comfortable silence, till Sakura took Syaoran's hand in hers and kissed him gently on the cheek.

"Thank you." She said genuinely.

"For what?" he asked, furrowing in confusion.

"For doing all this- for making me _feel_," a small, sad smile played at the corner of her full lips. "You are doing so much for me, but there is nothing I can do for you".

"I don't need anything. Only for you to stay with me and be happy."

Sakura averted her eyes from his and gazed at the setting sun. "It's beautiful…" she mumbled.

Syaoran pulled her toward him till she settled on his lap, and kissed her neck. "Just like you."

S&S

The next two weeks went by so fast. It was like living in a dream. Syaoran stayed over at Sakura's, not leaving her for a moment aside for the one time he went home to bring some clothes and to tell his mom he was over a friend's for couple of days, and asked her to tell his fiancée.

He still hadn't told Sakura about his planned marriage, but he had all the intension of breaking it anyway. There was no way in the world he could marry some other woman now that he had a chance to be with _her_.

Even if she didn't love him. As long as she needed him, wanted him, he intended to be there. He won't leave her.

Those two weeks were perfect. Every night they made love was more amazing than the former, and Sakura, feeling more and more secure and at ease with him, seemed to enjoy his company just as much.

Last night, she had used her Magic, drowning out his, and that made their love-making that much move powerful and amazing. She had even managed to joke bitterly about how her training actually came in handy that time.

And their mornings were all relaxed- even lazy- and sweet. They would wake up and just lay in each other's hold before going out for breakfast (or Syaoran would make them breakfast in bed) and then going on site-seeing- and not just in Hong-Kong or even just in China. This is where their Magical abilities came in handy the most as they transported to different famous sites all over the world, coming back to Sakura's apartment only late at night.

Yet, reminders of the cruel reality always popped up. The first was in France. The two of them made their way to the Eifel Tower, when they noticed an old woman struggling with her shopping bags, cursing, and Sakura hurried to her side, offering her help.

The old lady happily accepted. "You are such a doll," she smiled kindly at the younger woman who she knew was a tourist yet spoke flawless French. Sakura's body went rigid "not all young people like you would have offered help for an old woman like me."

Syaoran, who knew just enough French and listened to the exchange, hurried to distract the trembling girl by starting to speak about the places they planned on seeing in their 'vacation'.

The moment they said goodbye to the woman, Syaoran turned hastily to Sakura. "Are you okay? You knew it was just a figure of speech-" she cut him short by placing a finger on his lips to seal them.

"It's okay. I know that. You don't need to worry about me all the time. I need to learn not to freak out over every innocent remark," she reassured him, planting a small kiss on his cheek and taking his hand. "Come on, we should get going."

Frowning slightly, he compelled.

They got back to her apartment that day, and Sakura did everything she could to distract him. She didn't want him to worry about her.

"Syaoran! You are too stubborn for your own good!" she called hotly. It was the first time he saw her losing her temper. _Feisty_, he couldn't help but think as he gawked at her very short one-piece purple-punk attire. Her angry posture in that skimpy attire and her blazing eyes were quite a turn-on.

"-are you even listening to me?" she looked him over as her Magical-enforced senses took in the change in his mood. A seductive smirk made its way to her lips. "Oh? Someone feeling hot in here?" she ran one of her hand slowly over her slightly exposed breasts, down the valley between them to her stomach. Her lover's eyes followed the sow, tempting motion with hungry eyes. She leaned him to whisper in his ear, her hot breath caressing his skin, "Shame I'm not, then," her smirk grow as she straightened and made as to go toward the kitchen. Strong hands closed around her, preventing her from leaving.

"You are one hell of a woman, you know that?" Syaoran growled in her ear, biting on her exposed shoulder. Sakura shivered.

"I will take that as a compliment." She giggled at his behavior. Sakura gasped as his hand pushed stimulatingly again her covered womanhood.

"You are going to be gasping for air than to laugh for the next hours."

S&S

The next reminder of reality was because of Syaoran remembering his conversation with Touya.

"I wonder why was it that Touya told me you are back in Hong-Kong…"  
he told Sakura while they both walked hand-in-hand on a beach in the Caribbean bare-feet.

Sakura dug her feet into the wet sand. They both stopped walking. "Touya did?"

Syaoran furrowed. "You didn't know?"

"I haven't seen him for over a year."

He blinked. "I thought you knew- else, how did you think I found you?"

Sakura looked at him for a moment before answering. "I don't know. I never really wondered about that… maybe with your Magic, maybe someone recognized me…" she watched the waves hitting the land and recoiling back, her eyes clouded.

"Well, apparently, he is still watching over you… why did you two split up, anyway?" he asked, curios.

"I just… felt that I needed to be on my own," Sakura hesitated. _More like I didn't wanted to ruin his life any further…_ but she couldn't let the words out. She was too scared to think about the meaning they held for both her and Syaoran and their relationship.

"Well," Syaoran's voice drag her put of her pondering, "I think you should talk to him."

Sakura didn't answer.

The sun was setting when they sat, each of them holding ice-cream, just enjoying the view and each other's company. Sakura seemed to struggle with something, and Syaoran figured it would be better to wait for her to ask instead of prying.

"If you believed you were a hinder on someone else, someone you loved, would you stay with them?"

Syaoran considerate his answer for some time, and she let him, knowing he was taking the question seriously. "I'm not sure," he admitted, "I guess it is something you can't know unless you are there, in the situation. But I would like to believe I'd done the right thing- without cutting connection with them."

"And what would the right thing be?"

"Learning to get by on my own. Stop being a hinder."

**MySelf**: Yay~ finally an updated! And I must say, **MySelf** think the additions **MySelf** made really make the story better! And this chap is very long- hope it makes up for the late update!

**Me**: it sure took you long enough, though

**MySelf**: shut it! And anyway, we are back to school now (LAST YEAR! FIANLY!) And yesterday we've been at a wedding (it was AWSOME!) so you can't complain!

**I: I**'s feet still hurt from dancing on high heels!

**MySelf**: anyway, **MySelf** didn't get all the reviews **MySelf** wanted last time so… please **REVIEW**! **MySelf** need to know if we managed to slow this whole deal enough….

**LOvE Ya ALL!**

****EveRMorE****


	5. A Note

**A/N was erased**


	6. Sacrifices

**MySelf:** hohohohoho I'm baccckkk!

**I:** ya sound like a stupid ghost!

**MySelf**: at least I'm not a LAZY BUM!

**I**: say wha? Who cha calling lazy bum?

**MySelf**: YOU duh! You won't even finish your words like a normal person!

**I**: it's called _**accent**_! And people think mine is charming!

**MySelf**: sure they do. They don't want you to **jump **them!

**I**: at least **I** won't _eat _'em!

**Me**: whatever. You are getting on my nerves. Meantime, do move on with the story.

****Author Note**: I got a review I couldn't answer and kinda got to me. I just wanted to tell **Fail **two things: One, the long wait was mainly due to a problem I had tying up some loose ends of the story, **NOT** because I was "holding you (the readers) hostage". Two- I used to think a simple message of "carry on, please" is a waste of time, too- until I started writing myself. I don't know whether you write too or not, but I must say that for _**me**_, this simple message makes all the difference… just wanted to tell you.

**And now…**

**Enjoy the long awaited (not **_**that**_** long) chap!**

* * *

**Chapter five- Sacrifices**

_She saw the two last people she cared about in this world fighting for their lives. She saw the one who controlled her life so far about to kill them… the memories of the day she first met Master- when he supposedly came to 'visit' his brother and his family- and how he made her Magic to go berserk, surfaced. She was helpless back then, but she wasn't that little girl anymore._

_She had no intention on letting him destroy the people she cared about- again._

_Gathering all the Magic she could, the emerald-eyed girl washed them all in a white light strong enough to erase her enemy's very existence. But she couldn't, she realized. She couldn't possibly do such a thing… it will be far worse crime than killing him, and she already made up her mind not to kill again…_

_And so, she did the next best thing. First, she sent the one man who had managed to awaken her from what felt like a deep, deep slumber, to a safe place, leaving her necklace with him- a reminder, and a farewell memento. Then, she spoke to her brother, her flesh and blood, in his mind: "Touya, I have decided. I shall erase Master's memories- all of them- and give him a second chance to atone for his sins. And the two of us shall flee; feign death, so we, too, will have another chance…"_

"_Sakura! He doesn't deserve-"_

"_I need your help, brother. Will you help me?"_

"_Didn't I already tell you? Anything for you, little sister."_

_And with Touya as a Link, she tunneled the Magic Storm to do just that. But something wasn't right. Something went wrong…_

_The light engulfed them, getting hotter and hotter, and an enormous explosion erased everything…_

Sakura woke up panting and sweating. Until this very moment, she did not recall any of this. She believed she blacked out after sending Syaoran to safety, and never really thought about how or why was she alive, as she didn't view the subject as important… that dream, though, clarified things, and she'd figured that her using her Magic like she did drained her to oblivion after Touya and she transported to a safe place, and the overuse was like a shock to her body and brain, so she forgot. But why now, then? Why dream of this?

She had a bad feeling- like something bad was about to occur…

But she didn't want to worry Syaoran, who believed Katsuri was dead- and in a way, he was. Kinomoto Katsuri did not exist anymore… couldn't hurt them anymore… Could he?

S&S

It was in the beginning of their third week together- the time when Syaoran had figured he had to go and notify the rest of his family about him having no intention whatsoever to attend the wedding he was pretty much forced into- when thing went right down the drain.

Syaoran left, saying there was some unfinished urgent business he had to take care of, and Sakura decided she will go for some shopping, giving her apartment was emptied from anything edible.

Once she arrived at the grocery, she picked up the stuff she wanted, giggling to herself as she took a chocolate-flavor ice-cream, imagining Syaoran's face when he ate his ice-cream like a kid that time they went to his favorite beach. She was so deep in her happy thoughts when she went to pay at the cash register that she did not pay attention and clashed with someone and fell.

"Oh my god! I'm so sorry!" a feminine voice panicked. "Are you okay? I didn't see you!" a pretty, young woman with raven-black hair and ruby eyes helped Sakura to get up and collect the stuff she dropped. "I'm really sorry!" she repeated, apologizing.

"It's quite okay," Sakura said gently, shifting in her place uncomfortably. "I wasn't looking, either." she put everything for the cashier to do her job (after she will finish with her current costumer) and turned to the woman who kept fussing about the little accident. She noticed absently the expensive-looking ring on her ring-finger. It caught her attention because of the Magical Aura it was giving off.

The woman seemed to notice her stare. She raised her hand for Sakura to see, beaming with happiness.

"My wedding ring," she explained, though that much was obvious. "I'm getting married in a few days!" a weird shadow passed her face, clouding her excitement for a moment, but then it was gone. Sakura wondered if it was only her imagination. The woman seemed practically _glowing_ with happiness.

"Congratulations," she said weakly. She wasn't good around strangers- especially energetic ones like that woman appeared to be. She tried to find a polite way to get out of there. Luckily, the register just finished with the costumer before her and now turned to Sakura who gladly paid for the few things she took.

"Thank you! I'm so happy! Haha… though I sometimes wonder if Xiao Lang even feel something toward me…" her voice filled with sadness and her eyes gleamed with unshed tears.

_Xiao Lang?_ Sakura's attention alerted. _No way… It's got to be a mistake… I'm sure there is a lot of Xiao Lang-s…_

"Ano… you wouldn't, by any mean, be referring to Li Xiao Lang- the heir to the Li clan?"

"Why, yes. So you've heard of him… well he _is_ kinda famous", she answered.

_No… it can't be! Syaoran…_

"Hey, are you okay? You don't look so good- you are kind of pale, actually…"

"I-I'm fine. Sorry, I have to go." And with that, she just transported herself from there; not caring for the shocked looks aimed her way as she faded.

What was going on? Her mind was in a blur. She couldn't think straight. She felt as if the ground has disappeared from beneath her, and she was falling… falling into a blackness of fear and fright.

Did he lie to her?

No… he loved her. He wasn't lying when he said that. So why didn't he told her he was engaged? She would have understood…

She knew he would have broken the engagement had she asked. She also knew she would never do that. Was that the reason? Did he leave today to do exactly that on his own, without telling her?

_Yes_, she realized, _it would be so like him to do that. He is selfless. And he would sacrifice his own happiness for me…_ and even knowing that, she couldn't understand. Why would he do that? Why for some_thing_ like her? He knew she didn't love him as he loved her; he knew she might never will. And yet, he was willing to give up everything for her.

She was such a wreck thing.

A selfish, disgusting shell of a person. Empty, pretty porcelain doll who sucked the lives out of everyone around her; first her parents, who died because of her weak and childish self; then her brother, who sacrificed his very freedom to watch over her, letting his soul be consumed by darkness and sin; and lastly, the one person who managed to arouse feeling in her corrupted heart, the man who offered his unyielding love without asking or expecting anything in return.

_And she couldn't take it anymore_.

S&S

Syaoran was facing his mad mother with determination in his eyes. She had shout at him, called him a disgrace, begged for him to reconsider his action, to think of the consequences.

But nothing helped. He told her she and the Elders could go on with the wedding for all he cared- he won't be attending.

She told him he will be disowned; he answered he never wanted to take over the business from the first place. He will manage.

She told him to think about Meiling's feeling- he will break her heart; at that point his face darkened. "It won't kill her, mother. And what about _my_ feelings? You know full well I've never loved her. I only agreed to the marriage for the family's sake. But now Sakura is back, and she is more important to me than anything else."

"She will never be accepted." Yelan warned him stiffly.

"I don't care, mom. All I need is her. And as long as she will tolerate me, that is all that matters. Please tell Meiling I'm sorry. I will apologize personally later." And with those final words, he bowed to his mother respectably, and disappeared.

Yelan kept staring at the place from which her only son has faded for a long time.

S&S

Syaoran appeared at Sakura's with a smile. He was waiting for this moment- the moment his engagement will be broken and he will be free to act as he pleased- to ask her the question he was impatiently waiting to ask from the first day they rejoined; he intended to ask her to marry him.

But the moment his senses came to focus, he knew immediately something was wrong. That something had gone terribly wrong.

"Sakura!" he shouted, looking for her in panicked fashion. He ran to the bedroom- and froze.

_Please tell me,_

_Why are you floating?_

_Are waters supposed to be red?_

_Please tell me,_

_Why are you crying?_

_Are tears supposed to be shed?_

Surely, the world was crumbling, collapsing onto itself. Because otherwise, this sick joke couldn't possibly be real…

He slid to the floor, numb. He was only dreaming… in a moment, this nightmare will be over…

But he knew that was a lie- as all good things were, apparently. He might have laughed to the irony- or was it tragedy? - had he had left any breath in him.

"NO! SAKURA!"

Apparently, he still had enough air for that…

* * *

**MySelf**: another cliffhanger! Hohohohoho

**I**:….

**MySelf**: what do you want you staring bum?

**I: **ya evil ya know?

**MySelf**: hhmm…. Yes? Isn't it like, dunno- my _thing_?

**I**: just go away…

**MySelf**: what? No retort at all? Who are you and what have you done with **I**? Not that **MySelf** really care but she at least needs to finish her fanfic before you eat her…

**I:** you are _not_ funny! And you are a sadist! Why won't you tell **I** what happened to Sakuraaa! *cries*

**MySelf**: …so all this drama is because you want to know what's next? Oh my, **MySelf** touched!

**I ***hopeful puppy eyes*: so ya gonna tell **I**?

**MySelf ***snicker*****: you wish! Wait like everyone else! Muhahhaha!

**Me**: can't the two of you shut it? **Me** not in the mood! You stinky **MySelf**! **Me** want to know toooo!

**MySelf**: whatever. **MySelf** don't care about the two of you. Anyway please **review**! (Or be eaten!)

****Author Note 2: would you like more of Touya's POV? tell me if you want! (he will appear next chapter anyway...)**

**Love you all!**

****Evermore****


	7. Forever Yours

**I'm alive! Alive and kicking! I'm sosososo sorry for the late update! I was busy with school and figuring out how I wanted this chapter to go… don't kill me! Hehe…**

**I also wanted to answer some questions:**

**1) **Sakura and Syaoran can transport themselves to different places- that's how she got to his room (sorry if it wasn't clear enough)

**2) **Again, the story was meant to be a very short one. I know the pace is fast and all, but I seriously justcan't slow it down enough… I tried, more than once (that's why chapter four became two chapters instead of one) but guess I honestly just don't know how… (The original story was only 36 pages long) sorry if it sounds like an excuse, but the truth is the truth, and at some point after writing it gets hard to return to the story…

**3)** About the grammar errors- as I said, English is not my native language, only my second, and between writing, reading and speaking- writing is, naturally, the hardest for me… if you see any mistakes (like **agate. ilie **did) you can tell me where and I will fix it=]

**And now, on with the story! (Final chapter!.. kinda!)**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter six- Forever Yours**

"….we will do everything in our power-"

"…we can just pray now; her condition was very bad-"

"…Li-sama, you can rest for a while. We will make sure to wake you up the moment there will be any changes…"

The voices were one lasing white-noise. Syaoran could barely make out the words and their meaning. He felt dull, numb, shut out from the rest of the world. A bomb could blow up the entire place for all he could care or notice.

In his clenched hand was a single piece of paper that was more real to him than any of the people trying to talk to him.

He read it only once, but the words were burned onto his mind and memory to never fade:

_Syaoran,_

_I wanted to thank you; thank you for all you've done for me._

_You are the only reason I could maintained some form of 'Life' that was more that just Existing, held more meaning than just Surviving._

_But l guesses it just wasn't enough; I'm too far gone to be able to make it on my own. I was a doll fulfilling my Master's wishes for too long a time to be anything else. The threads connecting me to Master might be cut, but I can't keep my form of 'Living' without Master to hold the strings, to move me._

_**And I do not intend to drag you with me. **_

_My parents died for me and my brother. My brother gave up his freedom and humanity to protect me._

_I won't let you sacrifice your happiness, your whole world, for me, too._

_I wish I could tell you I love you, Syaoran, I really do, but I must be selfish to the very end, for you to be able to let go of me._

_The last weeks were like someone else's dream. Part of someone else's life. It was a gift you gave and will forever stay with me. It was what could have been had I was a normal human being. Had I not been tainted and corrupted- a sinner._

_Maybe we will meet again, in another life. I do hope so. I _believe_ so._

_And maybe there and then I will be able to tell you, my savior, that I truly and with all my heart and soul, love you._

_Live well, Syaoran, for me. You may hate me, but try to live a happy life. The life I could never live._

_I won't say goodbye, because we will meet again._

_Forever yours,_

_Sakura._

And as he replayed the words to himself in his head over and over, almost hearing her voice reading them in his ears, he couldn't stop the silent tears that fell down his cheeks to his chin, blinding him. He also hadn't notice the tall figure that appeared beside him.

"That stupid girl…" a soft voice said. The tone was gentle- and pained. Syaoran could tell. After all, her brother had given up everything for her. Just like him.

"She cut herself!" his voice was hoarse- and harsh. "She used Magic so it won't be healed easily! She fucking committed suicide!" he shouted.

Touya didn't reply. He didn't cry. He just bent his head slightly and closed his eyes.

"How can you be so fucking calm! She was your _sister_!" he jumped to his feet, facing the older man accusingly.

"She _still_ is," was Touya's reply. "She _still is_…" and he raised his head for Syaoran to see. And he saw. Touya's expression seemed like that of a person being burned alive. Like his very soul was tortured. Like someone has ripped out his heart.

They stayed like that, the younger man not trying to hide the tears that freely dripped from his eyes, the elder's feelings exposed for the former to see.

It was then that a middle-aged doctor came up to them, wearing a white robe.

"Are you the family of the patient Kinomoto Sakura?"

"Yes!" Syaoran faced her hastily, "How is she? Is she fine?"

"Are you Li-sama?" she asked, avoiding his question.

"_Yes_. I'm her fiancé," he lied, "And that is her brother. Now tell us!"

"Sir, we did everything we could. But-"

"NO!" he shouted. He didn't want to hear anymore! Why was she saying those words? Those words which could lead to only one end…

"-I'm so sorry, but she and the baby did not survive".

"Baby?" what was she saying? Sakura was not pregnant! There must be some kind of mistake… he allowed himself to hope she might have made mistake with the names. Another doctor will come any moment now, apologizing for the trouble, and telling them they can visit her…

"I'm sorry, I thought you knew? She was almost three weeks into her pregnancy…"

_Three weeks… it has been about three weeks since they met again…_

"No…" his voice was barely heard. "It can't be…" his whole body trembled; his feet gave in and he slid to the floor, numbness taking over him. The paper fell from his weakened grasp.

_**Flashback**_

"_This is nice. I can't remember someone ever holding me like that"._

_Syaoran chuckled at the girl in his arms; they had just rejoined, yet he was just as engrossed with her as he was in the past- if not more. He knew that their time together was uncertain just yet. That she might won't want him for life as he wanted her, but he intended on enjoying every moment they have._

"_Well, I'm sure your parents held you when you were a child," he offered, smiling._

"_When I- when they died I was just a little more than a baby… and then Master adopted me and my brother. I can't really remember them…" she whispered._

_He felt stupid and helpless hearing her tone. For a moment, he actually forgot who they both were, forgot everything that happened. The hate toward the man who ruined her life returned. "If you weren't so sure he died that day, I swear to god I would have hunt him down and kill him myself. __**Slowly**__." He said harshly, his body tense._

_She sighed and hugged him, easing his rage. He loosened his muscles and kissed her forehead._

"_He is gone. It is better to let it go," she whispered. "Anyway, I don't remember them, really. I guess that's one of the reasons I want to have a big family and lots of kids one day, if possible…"_

_**End flashback**_

He laughed, then. She said she wanted to have a big family. He would have given her one- he _intended_ to. And they were gonna have a baby! A beautiful child with her eyes and his hair… they would love and raise that child, would make sure he or she would know nothing but happiness…

Syaoran let himself sink into that happy world; this world where everything was okay, where Sakura and he were happily raising their many children, loving them, protecting them…

S&S

People came and left. His mother, Meiling- trying to comfort him; the Elders- telling him they will forgive him as long as he just forget that girl and marry the woman they chose for him… none of them held any significant. The only talk that held any importance was his conversation with Touya, who refused to break down as he caught Syaoran's trembling body, keeping _him_ from breaking, telling him his sister wouldn't want to see him like that…

"_Why do you care!"_ he had yelled.

"_Because that is what she would want"._

"_Sakura is _dead_!"_

Those were the last words spoken between them. Touya told him he had to pull himself together and keep on living- for _her_ sake.

But Syaoran couldn't let her go. He sat at her empty and cold apartment, not eating or drinking unless forced, ignoring everyone and everything, and torturing himself by reliving every moment he shared with _her_, every word spoken, every touch…

Why did he leave her alone? He blamed himself, hated himself; he should have never left! Then he would be angry with her for what she did. Then hating her for leaving _him_, for giving up…

And yet, loving her for those very same reasons.

_My Sakura… I love you so… wait just a bit longer…_

S&S

Touya woke up panting from his nightmare; a distant memory about the past. He felt strange.

_Something isn't right_. He knew it with every bone in his body. He could almost _feel_ it…

It was an impulse that made him get dress and run from his apartment to his now dead sister's.

When he got there twenty minutes later, he saw that, indeed, the place wasn't empty.

Syaoran was sitting on the floor, staring at nothing, as far as the older man could see.

"What are you doing here?" the quiet question was devoid of any real interest.

Touya made an irritated noise. "I need to check something." Was his blunt answer. The amber eyed man turned to look at him.

"Like what?"

"Something… just doesn't feel right." Touya moved to the center of the small living room and closed his eyes. "You know I'm a Sensor, right?" Syaoran nodded. "Well, I can track Magic back to its source like every Sensor, but sometimes, especially with familiar Magic, I can also _see_ the events that occurred daring the time the Magic was used and active."

Syaoran blinked, not understanding. "So-?"

With an exasperated sigh, Touya motioned for him to get up. "Just watch."

_**The previous day**_

_An agitated Sakura appeared in her empty apartment's living room. She sat on the sofa, trembling slightly. In was as if she moved in a dream. A moment of madness. She summoned a paper and a pen and scribed down hastily, as if in a haze, her message to Syaoran._

_When she was done writing, she ran to the kitchen and grabbed a sharp, silver knife, then went to the bedroom. She sat on the bed, taking fast shallow breathes._

_What exactly was it that she meant to do? She stared at the knife, dazed. She shook her head furiously as if to clear her mind. It didn't help._

Think Sakura! Something is wrong with you! _She was aware of her own strange, hasty behavior, and she knew it wasn't like her. It felt as if- as if… someone was messing with her mind…_

_Shakily, she forced herself to sit on the floor in a meditation pose. She slowed her breath, trying to calm herself. She withdrew into herself, to this quiet place which was her private haven through years of abuse and hurting. When she was there, it was as if time stopped, and she was the only person on the world… safe, free._

_But she wasn't alone. Suddenly, she could feel another, unfamiliar presence there with her._

_It wasn't threatening not intimidating in any way, and so she allowed herself to let her guard down- only slightly._

_And she realized the presence wasn't all that unfamiliar after all. How could it, when she recognized herself and Syaoran's Auras in that small, pulsing warm source of power and life?_

_She couldn't breath. It was too shocking. She opened her eyes, her hands flowing to her flat stomach._

How-?_ But of course, she shouldn't be so surprised, she recalled, blushing. Whenever Syaoran and she made love, they never bothered about protection. In all honestly, she never even seriously considered the chance of her getting pregnant._

_Se rose to her feet in wonder, a soft smile gracing her flawless face. Then she shot a look to the paper the wrote on earlier, upset at herself for ever _thinking_ about doing something so absurd like giving up her life… it might not be ideal, but she had Syaoran, she had her brother._

_And she soon will have a child._

_And she could already picture it, could see the future she oh-so-craved…_

"_Hmm, so you managed to slip from my grasp on you mind," a cold, chilling voice she could never forget came from behind her._

_She jumped around, frightened._

_And indeed, she saw her worst nightmare coming to life, rising from the pits of hell itself to torture her._

"_Really now, did you think you can get rid of me so easily? I must say I'm disappointed, my doll. I certainly didn't train you to be so vulnerable and off guarded, did I?" the taunting voice of Kinomoto Katsuri which haunted her sleep spoke softly, dangerously._

_She stared, unable to move or speak or even think. The only thing on her mind was why. Why did she deserve that?_

_His face looked hideous what with it being scarred and burned. His once strong body looked bent somehow, deformed just like his face. His voice was hoarse, and a scar could be clearly seen across his throat._

_Sakura let out a weak whimper. _Please god, no_…_

_He smirked with malice evident in his dark eyes. Dark like the bottomless depths of the abyss itself…_

_Pain shot though her body, and she absently realized he used a mind-control spell on her._

_The knife stabbed into her other hand as well before falling from her hand with a thumb._

I'm sorry, Syaoran… _her hands hugged her belly protectively as she fell to her knees, loosing blood faster than from any normal wound. Her thoughts were irrational, discarded. He stoll her ability to even _think_ of resisting or fighting back without her noticing at all. The only thing on her mind that made any sense was the knowledge that she had to protect her child._

_Katsuri watched the light slowly leaving the broken girl's eyes, emotionless. He wanted to kick her, to break her mentally completely buy harming that abomination growing in her body, but he couldn't afford for her to have any visible bruises to indicate she was harmed by someone other that herself._

_Not just yet, that is._

_**Present time**_

The two men got out of trance with similar expressions of pure rage, horror and hatred on their face.

Their breath was loud and fast as if they just finished a marathon, their vision blurry with their uncontrolled fury.

"I knew you'd figure it out eventually, Touya. You were always an intelligent boy. Though I must say I expected you earlier."

The two showed no sign of surprise as they turned twin deathly glares at the smirking man who came up behind them, just as he did the day before with their most beloved person.

"My, you look angry," he mocked them. Not the smartest thing to do to a trained assassin and a powerful MagicUser under normal circumstances, even when they weren't so far gone with grief, and guilt and hatred.

Syaoran saw red. It was hard to get enough oxygen into his system. The urge to _kill_ and get his justice and revenge combined with his sorrow drove him to the edge.

And the appearance of the cause to everything that happened was the push that made him fall over that edge of sanity and into murderous insanity.

And then the two young men launched, as if on cue. It was a blur of action to Syaoran's dazed mind. He punched, kicked, summoned his Magic, drew blood, lost some of his own… Touya and he, fighting almost purely on instinct, managed to push that monster n human shape into a corner- literally.

The apartment around them looked like a warzone- ruined, Magic-flood, shaking from the sheer power each of them emitted.

And yet, for some reason they couldn't comprehend, Katsuri just kept smirking somewhat crazily and didn't really put much of a fight- just enough for him to escape death.

Then he laughed, and the two froze, coming out of their frenzy state to stare at him. He was _mad_! What was he thinking!

"I wont' let any of you disrespect me anymore! Never! You will all die!" he shouted and released the power he was gathering just for this moment- the power to cause a MagicStorm so strong and enormous it will destroy everything in radius of who-knows-how-many-miles.

Escape was inevitable, they both knew it, and so they had last course of action they could possibly take; they had no intention of letting any more innocent die of the hand of this man.

Glancing at each other with mutual understanding, Touya opened the Links, acting as a medium for Syaoran to draw upon the Magic that was forever present in the world, so he could bridle it to his effort to get the MagicStorm under control.

They both knew the consequences of such acts, but neither of them was bothered by it. It was a good way to say goodbye…

_Wait for me, Sakura._

* * *

**MySelf**: poor Sakura… poor Syaoran… poor Touya

**I**: **I** can't believe ya did such thing to them…

**Me**: and now you pretend to feel sorry for them!

**MySelf**: chill you guys… **MySelf** actually having a delicate moment here…

***I** and **Me** watching **MySelf**, dazzled*

**MySelf**: yep. Moment is over! Now, don't worry there is a short but satisfying **Epilogue** coming up! Just wait a little longer!

**Ne, ne, was it okay? I wasn't sure about the final scene, and it's different from what I originally intended… please please please tell me what you thought! Oh and, did I manage to drew some emotion from you with Sakura's letter? (Hehe I must admit I almost cried when I wrote it…) Please please **_**please**_review** and share your thoughts on the ending! I hope you liked and I hope I managed to touch you, at least a little! And now there is only the **Epilogue** left and I'm done with my very first fanfic ever!**

**Love ya all!**

****evermore****


	8. Epilogue

**I am so so so very sorry. Never meant to put the disappearing act like that… but honestly, this story, if I say so myself, had a lot of potential, and I thought of rewriting it as a longer one… but really, I just lost interest.**

**Yet, I decided at least to give you the bittersweet (though it is more sweet than bitter=]) finale.**

**So here is the Epilogue. I wanted to make it longer and add a scene that will clear up what happened at the end of the last chapter, but again, I just can't find it in me right now to get back to the story…**

**Hope you will enjoy, though….**

**read A/N at the end** Enjoy=]

**Epilogue- Tragedy's end, New Life's Beginning**

It has been over fifty years since The Tragedy, as people liked to call it. The Li Tragedy was quite the popular and famous story among the town's people, especially among the young ones: the girls thought it was romantic and beautiful and, well, _tragic_. The boys thought it was a good way to scare the girls and the younger kids by using it to make up ghost stories.

And, ofcourse, it had become a sort of tradition for young couples (usually because of the female half's insistence) to go and 'pray' before The Tree that was growing were the apartment of the famous girl from the story once stood. It was also believed that if two people of the opposite sexes met under The Tree at the night of the full moon- they were meant to be together.

Young Ying-Fa didn't believe in all those ghost stories her big brother told her- or so she claimed. And so she found herself being forced to prove it by going to that very Tree, alone, at midnight, on the night of the full moon.

The young eleven-year-old would never admit to it, but she was frightened. She was practically trembling.

She arrived at said place at said time and waited, checking her watch every few seconds. She was supposed to stay till exactly 00:05…

A rustle near her made her jump and scream in terror "HHOOEEE!". She knew it! The ghosts came for her! She was going to die…

"Gee, I think I just went deaf with that scream!" annoyed voice that seemed to come out of nowhere almost made her faint was heard.

"P-please mister g-ghost don't eat me!"

"What the hell-? Oh, you seriously thought I was a ghost?" the voice started to laugh.

"Y-you aren't a g-ghost then?"

"No…"

"So why are you invisible!"

"Am I, now?" and a young boy appeared as if out of thin air and walked toward the frightened girl. "Do I look like a ghost to you?" he chuckled as he walked towards her.

Ying-Fa watched him warily- and froze. The moonlight touched his face, revealing chestnut unruly hair that made her hands itch with desire to try and set it right, and the pair of the most beautiful and piercing amber eyes she had ever seen. She never thought she would call a boy 'pretty', but that was exactly the description most fitting for this strangely familiar-looking boy…

"Do you not recognize me, Sakura?"

"How did you-"

"Know your name?" he finished her line and smiled at her. It was a strange smile- filled with sadness and pain and longing. "I was waiting forever for you, after all."

"For me?" her big Emerald-green eyes sparkled with unexplained sudden emotion that came over her. "Who… are you?"

"My name is Xiao Lang. Syaoran."

"Syaoran…" familiarity washed over her, making her heart skip a beat- and afterward, double its rhythm. "Syaoran…" tears flow freely from her eyes. She wasn't scared now. Actually, she felt safe. Truly safe. She didn't understand why or how, but somehow she knew that boy.

He came to stand before her, barely a foot from her. He made no move to try and touch her, but his eyes roamed over her, taking in her image.

"Do you know," he breathed, "The story of this place?"

She nodded weakly, but he ignored her and continued. "According to the story, there was once a young rich heir who fell in love with the most beautiful girl. But that girl, she lived a hard life and was stripped from her humanity and feelings. She was a doll.

"But the young heir couldn't give up on her, and so he helped her recall she was once human being and turn against her Master and cut her strings.

"But she was a doll for too long, and slowly faded into the darkness, giving up her soul, her heart, her existence, her life. She left the man who loved her and chose to put an end to her current self. But she left him a note, in which she wrote they will meet again, in another world, at another life, and asked him to live happily until then. Only when it was too late, did he found out she regretted her decision to put an end to her life, and instead was killed by the very person who ruined her life.

"She asked him in the letter to live, but he couldn't. And so, the day after her death, on the night of the full moon, when he and her brother realized what really happened after coming to her empty house, he used all of his Magic, destroying the place and putting an end to his life in order to put an end to the life of siblings' Master. After the MagicStorm died down, the only thing left was a single seedling. _That_ seedling." He turned to the blooming Sakura Tree.

"I began to believe you will never come, Sakura," his voice was soft, caressing. "It feels like I was waiting for eternity…"

"Syaoran…"

He closed the little distance between them and put a finger on her lips.

"You promised," he stated calmly. "You said there was something you wanted to tell me if- _when_- we will meet again".

She shivered slightly, but smiled. Despite the tears, she burst with happiness. The waiting had come to an end, at last.

"I love you," she whispered against his finger, her eyes shimmering. "I love you, forever, my Syaoran".

"As do I." and he crushed her into a strong hug.

And she hugged him back.

* * *

Ssooo…. Did you like? What did you think about the story and its conclusion? And would you like me to rewrite the whole story?

I know I might not really deserve that after this long wait, but if any of you guys still read this chapter, than thank for sticking around, and please write me a **review**…

I want to know your thoughts! And if you bothered reading, then it ain't that hard to push that nice little button and drop a nice review=] I mean, it _is_ the last and finishing piece of the story!

**I love you all and thank for your support. Sorry for the wait.**

****Evermore****


	9. Sequel

**Soo… I got a request for a sequel. I must say I thought the epilogue I wrote was kinda a sequel itself, but if it wasn't enough and you want me to write something like Sakura and Syaoran ten or so years after the epilogue, do tell.**

**I'm not promising anything, but if enough people will ask, I just might comply==]]**

**Anyway, tell me whether you'd like, and if you do, then what kind of sequel would you like.**

**Love you all and thanks for reading, whether you reviewed or put my story on Alert/Favorite!**

****Evermore****


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